Jul 26, 2019
Who’s got a sturdy noose handy so I can hang myself and end the misery?
As if the steady banging of neon flashing little boy shoes with the tiny roller wheels into the back of my seat isn’t enough, there’s the incessant whining that is unsuccessfully quelled with parental coddling that makes me want to set the...
Jul 19, 2019
It happened in the co-ed dormitory at college. There I was chatting it up outside of someone’s room in the hallway when I heard the words splattered out in a high pitch cheer. “Mikey”! It is one of my buddies who is twice my size. He comes charging down the hallway with what I think is going to be a loving bear...
Jul 12, 2019
“People on ‘ludes should not drive.”
This elementary declaration made by the infamous Jeff Spicoli from the 1980’s movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High should ring indisputable to anyone who’s ever clutched a steering wheel (The Quaalude was a popular sedative in the 70’s). And if you’ve seen the movie,...
Jul 5, 2019
Remember that movie where the guy is dying of thirst in the desert and he keeps thinking that he sees water up ahead, but it’s only a mirage? Well that is what your brain is doing when it tells you that if you drink more alcohol, you’ll feel better. And be more amazing. And be a more amazing singer.
You know how it...