Jul 11, 2022
Make bad decisions. End of
story.
Well, there’s more
actually.
See, we all know that It’s
difficult to think clearly when gazing through the glowing lens of
beer goggles. Because when everything in your periphery is enhanced
by fuzzy Glamour Shot lighting, the miscalculation alarm can be
severely compromised when your weaker senses are enticed.
Suddenly, casting caution to the
wind makes perfect sense, and you are down because you’ve just
unlocked the jailed trap star who runs the city. That antisocial
video gamer who clocked in this morning with a Best Buy name tag
just got run over by the tank that is the new confident and
boastful Chief Executed Baller. With a couple shots and a beer
satiating the gullet, the amazing new you has emerged. And this
dude is a fucking player who struts with swagger and makes the
calls, ready to order some rounds and make some memories.
This is the juncture in the
evening where terrible ideas become sound opportunities to prove to
the world that the tin man just needed a few drops of oil. A few of
these ill-advised decisions include tossing back a fifth shot of
Fireball whiskey, doubling up on the stack of waffles, and cranking
the ignition on the Hyundai. It all makes beautifully perfect
sense. Oh, and hooking up with your childhood bestie.
Not all decisions made when drunk are bad, however. The moment you decided to hit a homeless guy’s scraggly joint on the sidewalk after slapping his palm with a twenty spot instead of scoring an eight ball of blow was the best decision you made all week.