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Stoney Baloney | A Narrated Cannabis Column


Sep 6, 2019

Now I’m going to sound politically incorrect here but know that I have empathy for the homeless. However, not everyone who begs is homeless. Some of these fine people just wish to capitalize on your inability to look away.

We’ve all pulled up to an intersection where there is a panhandler on full display and your first thought is one of annoyance, “Gee whiz, I did not ask for this.” Only a moment ago you were enjoying a peaceful moment with your thoughts before being unsuspectingly thrust into a moral dilemma that requires your involvement, propositioned by a space invader raiding your private sanctuary with a piercing glare, challenging you to meet eyes, unflinching and severe. These are champions of staring contests, professionals, and they intend to collect their prize money.

And however badly you wish to ignore this situation, the impulse to grab a curious glance is undeniable. You’re interested in their pitch, their appearance, lured by fascination.

Begging has become an art form, really. Will it be the lighthearted sign with a smile and a friendly wave, or the rock bottom desperation with watery eyes that washes you with guilt, influencing you to contemplate reaching into your cash stash? Either way, you might resent this person for forcing you to make an unwelcomed decision that will have lasting implications, leaving you with either the feeling of pity, or that of having been hoodwinked.

By the way, if you have a joint lit or a vape pen handy, you should always offer without thinking twice. It’s like sharing your food.

And you will never regret getting someone stoned.

Unless they won’t give it back.