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Stoney Baloney | A Narrated Cannabis Column

Mar 28, 2022

The finger reaches into the hole.

And why not? Although this appendage often sits idle, like an old motor, it is a tool best maintained with regular use. And as the subconscious wanders into aimless thought while tediously inching through rush hour traffic, the instinct directs the fingernail toward an accessible area...


Mar 21, 2022

If you’re baked just about anything tastes incredible. But there’s a big difference between the stoner who stares into a bowl of Fruit Loops like it’s the glowing briefcase in Pulp Fiction and the sadomasochist who invites the pungent pucker of pickle juice straight to the larynx. This is an extreme difference...


Mar 14, 2022

Discussing urine sounds disgusting. After all, what we’re referring to is liquid waste that is excreted from your body. And it’s generally yellow. If you’ve taken your vitamins, that is. But when you really break it down, it’s just water that regulated your system so that it functions optimally. And the facts...


Mar 7, 2022

I’m going to be the voice of reason right now by telling you that you gotta get your cardio in. That’s just how it is. You see, the reason we have bodies at all is because gravity pulls matter toward the earth and your muscles have developed into what they are today because of that resistance which forces you to...